And definitely let me know if you do any of these things. Last year, some of my readers actually did one of the more outrageous things on the list by going to Friday's and pretending their friend's name was Mo and that it was her birthday. Hee. The friend had no idea who the hell I was.

Oh, except if you do number four, it just means that you're scary.

1. Make an Escapades list of your own-- get started by doing something you've always wanted to do, but have never done before. Add the list to Greyson's Adventure List page.

2. Pretend that your name is Monique. (Especially if you're a guy.) Make people call you Monique all day long.

3. Wear wrist fluffies. (You can create fluffies by purchasing a feather boa, cutting it in half and wrapping one half around each wrist.) Do the wrist fluffy disco.

4. Have www.mopie.com tattooed onto your body.

5. Go to a pet store and watch the parakeets for a while. (You can buy one, but only if you promise to take very, very good care of it, and let it fly around all the time. Naming it after me or one of my birds is entirely optional. Singing the Cassiecabana song is recommended.)

6. Go to Starbucks and order the coffee beverage of your choice. (I recommend the caramel macchiatto.) Tip big.

7. Buy yourself a balloon. Balloons are happy.

8. Go see a movie. Your movie snack should consist of a Diet Coke and a box of Junior Mints. Or those little Snocaps. Those are good too.

9. Write me and say hello, especially if you've never written before. I always like getting mail, and I always answer it. Eventually.

10. Put your hair in Bjork buns or mental patient loops, which are two of my favorite hair styles. Bjork buns (ingredients: long hair, four rubber bands) are accomplished by making one ponytail on each side of the head, and twisting each ponytail into a bun and securing with a rubber band. Mental patient loops (as seen on a recent episode of Buffy) involve two rubber bands, and long hair. Just create ponytails on each side of the head as usual, but the last time you pull your hair through, don't pull it through all the way. This will create a loop, and also hair sticking out everywhere, which is v. endearing. I hope. (Take a picture of this and send it to me.)

11. Watch Waiting for Guffman. Just because it's a really good movie.

12. Indulge my hankering to be called "Moey." C'mon, just for a day?

13. Join the mo-tify list. (How is it that I haven't been calling it the mo-tify list all along?)

14. Sing very loudly in public. Bonus points if you sing badly, get weird looks from strangers, or pick a song I really like.

15. Create a work of art. (Photograph, painting, poem, song... whatever.) Dedicating it to me and sending it to me is optional.

16. Wear a really obnoxious hat. A Muppet Hat is ideal, but unfortunately, there's only really one true Muppet Hat.

17. Play The Sims. Name one of your Sims after me. Consider that party balloons and a vibrating heart shaped bed will make the Mo Sim happy. Send me periodic reports on what the Sim is doing, and who she's doing it with.

18. Have sex with me! (This only applies to a select few of you. You know who you are.)

19. Write a poem, even if you think it sucks, even if you've never written a poem before, even if it rhymes. Send it to me.

20. Sing the Cassiecabana song. Loudly.

21. Look at this list and say derisively, "Birthdays. Feh." (This option is only available if you are Tim.)

22. Bake me some cookies. Mmm. I like cookies.

23. Dye your hair some outrageous color that you've always wanted to try. (Then, let your roots grow out for like six months, so half your hair is one color and the other half is the other color. So you can have bizarre two-toned hair, just like me.)

24. Do something nice for yourself on my behalf. And wear glitter while you do it.

25. Organize a fireworks display right over my house. Include those fireworks like they have at the end of Annie that spell out my name. Or skywriting! Skywriting would be good, too.

26. Just remember I love you. And keep reading!

I've also got some resolutions for the next year. Probably not twenty six of them, but some resolutions nonetheless.

Keep up the good work. I'd like to continue all the good habits I've developed this year. Of course there's room for improvement, but I do try harder to be nice to people, I eat better, I exercise more, I write more. I have more self control. I'm not a profligate spender. I have my escapades list, which is very motivating and has some worthwhile stuff on it. I'm almost constantly working on something off that list, and it's a great thing. I officially pat myself on the back, and resolve to keep on keepin' on.

Become an activist. The other morning, I woke up to find my alarm clock was on a Christian radio station, and it was some group of Christian lawyers who fight to keep evolution and homosexuality and Catcher in the Rye off the school curriculums. They're the ones who try to get abortion outlawed. They fight the ACLU. You know, those guys. And it outraged me, of course, and I shut off the radio. Which got me to thinking: all those people are out there doing something, fighting for their beliefs. Shouldn't I be doing the same thing? Don't I feel just as strongly as they do? Don't I want my voice heard on the opposing side? Ignoring the things that piss me off will not make them go away. I'm going to do something this year besides give money to good causes. I am going to get involved.

Pay my bills on time. Once I get some money from the sale of my apartment building (well, my fourth of an apartment building) I am going to try and buy some type of property. I need good credit for this. This won't be for at least a couple of years, so I am going to try and have two years of great credit.

Have my health issues taken care of. I still have recurrent UTIs. I still have gallstones. Again, my motto is, "Ignoring the problem will not make it go away." I need to go to the doctor and start getting these things taken care of. As scary as it may be.

Keep submitting poetry. Submitting poetry is odd. For instance, right now, I have thirty seven poems submitted to various markets. So now all I can really do is sit back and wait. However, in another couple of months, I should start hearing back from the markets, and I should have some new stuff written. So every couple of months or so, I should be doing a wave of submissions.

Remember birthdays. Oh, this is so hard for me. I always remember birthdays on the day of the birthday, making it too late to buy gifts or anything. I've tried to have some central location where I write down birthdays, but I've never been able to do it. My parents have a sort of calendar that hangs in the bathroom, with birthdays and anniversaries on it. That's a great idea, but I've never been able to find one of those calendars, which is my big excuse. If anyone has any suggested methods for keeping track of this stuff, I'd love to know. And hey, if you're a friend of mine, send me your birthday. Pretty please?

Get car insurance. And go to the dentist. Being a grownup means doing things that you don't want to do once in a while.

Read the news. I'd like to become a little more politically aware (see be an activist above) and I'd also like to keep up a little better on news. I read CNN.com and the New York Times sporadically. But I have no idea what's going on in northern Ireland, or the Middle East, or Bosnia right now. Absolutely none. And that's just plain wrong.

Keep it real.

"13. Make up an award (complete with cheesy award graphic) and give it to Monique."