Sorry, that was a disgusting digression. What was I saying? Yes, well, I splurged on things this week. I don't know if it's due to my wealth-generating mirror, or the fact that I've been working insane amounts of hours-- either way, I have a wee financial cushion this month. It is sweet. And refreshing!

I finished tutoring one of my students this week, and on the way out the door I got a thank-you card containing $40 in cash. My first tip! (While I'm on the subject, how the heck do you write a thank-you card for cash? "Thank you very much for the cold hard cash. I will use it to buy gasoline and tampons. Yours sincerely.") I decided with my graduation coming up, I would use that money towards a half-decent haircut.

I aspire to be as cute as my new girlcrush, Erin!

I went to the Fancy Salon next to my work. (I work on a street with a lot of fancy, pretentious stores. There's a boutique next door that I like to call "Tiny Clothes for Miniature Women" and everything there costs a thousand dollars.) The person who cut my hair was fabulous and hip, spoke perfect English, and de-mushroomed me. She gave me the cutest haircut ever, with the most darling side-part. I want to marry this woman and have her stylish little babies.

Also featuring "sexy jutting collarbone" and "flabby arm flab (of sexiness)."

Then she slathered a bunch of Bumble & Bumble on my head and gave me crazy rumpled sex head. It was a style that said, "Hey, look at me! I have just had many hours of sex!" I don't think it quite worked for me, especially since I was wearing my hillbilly overalls, which modified it to, "Hey, look at me! I have just had many hours of sex! With my brother!"

Thank god I don't have a brother.

The second splurge was dinner at Millennium, a famous vegan restaurant in San Francisco. It was very lucky that I was able to go; normally I work every Wednesday night at the Bux, but my tutoring schedule has been so madcap that I had to get my shift covered so I could tutor some extra students in the evening. But the tutoring was over in time for me to make the dinner! (I know you don't care at all about these logistics, but it was exciting for me.)

You see, Beth was in town to prepare for her Supreme Court appearance, so a bunch of us went out to dinner. We had amazing food and wine, gossiped shamelessly, teased each other mercilessly, formed at least two secret clubs (actually, I think they might be support groups) and did some topless quilting. And of course, there was interpretive dance! Isn't there always?

You never count your money, when you're sittin' at the table...

Today I worked and worked and worked, another one of those nine-to-nine days I have come to know and love, or at least tolerate. I have students crammed in at all sorts of ridiculous hours for the next couple of weeks. (Minus the three days coming up, for my ghetto graduation vacation! I should have planned a thing.)

Tutoring is not bad right now. There have been times when all of my students are preparing for the same test (the SAT I of course) and I run from house to house, delivering the same damn spiel on analogies five times in a row. These days I am teaching a nice mix of SAT I and other things (History, Literature, Writing, the ACT) so I haven't been repeating myself at all. Makes a big difference in my ability to stay perky!

I was in a good mood all through this long-ass tiring day, though, and do you know why? Because for the first time in an eternity, I don't loathe my hair! I feel saucy and sexy and I am convinced that every single person I meet wants to make sweet worshipful love to me. It doesn't even look the best right now, and I still feel like the cutest thing ever.

Even if it's all in my head.

Oh my god-- Liza Minnelli? Is that you?