Week One
This was the first week of my 12 Weeks/25 Pounds Weight Watchers challenge. And let me tell you, I will try to think of a catchier name sometime in the next 11 weeks. How did I do on my weigh-in? How did I do on my weekly goals? Let's find out!

1. Wear a pedometer every day, including on the weekend (so I can get credit for the hiking).
I totally did not do this. Partly because one of my pairs of pants doesn't work with a pedometer, and partly because I was on vacation. But I did do a lot of physical activity this weekend, or at least a nice healthy amount. I tracked about two hours worth of hiking, and then there was more general wandering around and climbing down rocks and so forth.

2. Stay on program with Weight Watchers. (Including writing everything down.)
I was about half successful with this. I did write a lot of things down, but not everything. I did stick to healthy snacks, mostly. And when we went out to dinner, I ordered super healthy stuff from the low-fat menu. I did better than I ever have before, while on vacation, in terms of sticking to my weight-loss program. I hope at the end of this week, I will have lost some weight, because while I was certainly not perfect, I did make an effort.

3. Two upper body workouts and two ab workouts. (Even though I have a short and busy week; let's see how it goes.)
Totally did not do even one of these workouts.

4. Attend a Weight Watcher's meeting while on vacation.
I ended up attending a meeting right before we left, because the logistics of the meeting locations were a little complicated and confusing. But I did make it to a meeting, which was the important part. I lost 2.4 pounds in my first week. So that's only 22.6 more pounds to go in the next 11 weeks.

Now for this week's goals:

1. Stay on program (write everything down) and attend meeting on Saturday.
2. Do one ab workout and one upper body workout. (It's a short and busy week, but this is attainable.)
3. Go on at least one bike ride.
4. Limit myself to one treat per day. (I was doing this on vacation, and it was a good thing to keep in mind.)

I will try and post something more exciting than this later on.
- posted by mo @ 9:56 AM

 
Why Eat This?
I'm pimping Julie all over the place today, but it's thanks to her food log that I've really begun thinking about why I'm eating something. Even if that awareness has not actually changed anything, I feel like I'm learning things. For example, here are some reasons that come up over and over again in my food log.

Specific Craving. For instance, I dream about a Barney's milkshake and then can't stop thinking about the milkshake. Then I cleverly mention it, implanting the desire for this milkshake in my boyfriend's head until he offers to split one with me. For example.

Overwhelming Desire. This is when, for instance, there is a warm plate of chocolate chip cookies brought into the office. (This, sadly, has not ever happened. But if it did.) Part of it is just because it's there (see below), but the other part is that it's something really delicious, and worth splurging on. At least it's worth it in the moment.

Because It's There. My least favorite of all of these reasons and, quite frankly, one that comes up a lot more than Specific Craving or Overwhelming Desire. There are leftover pastries in the kitchen and they don't look that great, but hey, they're there!

That reminds me: yesterday there were really awesome looking pastries in the kitchen, and I felt Overwhelming Desire, and did not choose to eat any of the pastries. But I could describe them to you in intimate detail, because I thought about them for a long time. (Oh, the food-obsessed mind of the fat girl.) I also said no when someone walked up to me in the morning and offered me a Krispy Kreme donut. Yesterday was a virtuous day.

Level 4+ Hunger. At my meeting last week, my Weight Watchers leader talked about how this is the downfall for a lot of people. Like you're at work, and you're busy, and hours go by, and suddenly you realize you aren't just mildly hungry, but "starving" and then you just want something to eat, NOW, and you could easily make bad choices.

Plan Devised When Not Hungry, Then Executed. Or PDWNH. That looks like hacker-speak. This is the ideal according to Weight Watchers. You plan your meals ahead of time, whether it's bringing your lunch in or planning to go out for a turkey sandwich, or whatever it is. And it's not just ahead of time like the day before; it's ahead of time like before you get hungry. After breakfast, start thinking about lunch. With a full stomach and a rational mind, you will make far better choices than if you just wait to be hungry and decide then. At least this is very true for me.

Anyway I hope if I forgot a category, someone will let me know. I find it all very fascinating for some reason.
- posted by mo @ 12:38 PM

 
Complete Food Companion
I bought the Weight Watchers Complete Food Companion this weekend, and I give it the Ointy stamp of approval.

I looked up cereal, and the CFC has all the brand names listed, plus the serving sizes, so rather than walking through the grocery store staring at labels, trying to do the math in your head or pulling out your points slider, you can just scroll down the list and say, "Hey, Fiber One! No points! I'm getting that!" Or notice that your Grape Nuts are actually not that efficient, point-wise. Instead you shoud be eating Kashi Cinna-Raisin crunch, because it is 2 points for a cup, whereas Grape Nuts is like 6 points.

And you can do this for every type of food! "Hmm, I want some cheese." And then you scroll down the list until you find something that looks good (Laughing Cow Swiss Light Wedges, 1 point each) and then you know exactly what to look for in the grocery store.

I also found some crackers that I want to get (I think they are one of the Wasa brands) and can I just tell you how much time I have spent staring at cracker labels to try and find the One True Cracker? "This one has more fat, but more fiber. This one has less fiber, but fewer calories... oh fuck it, I'm getting Oreos." Etcetera.

I swear I will get out of the C section one of these days, but for now, I have to say I'm glad I spent the nine bucks.

(The Dining Out Companion, on the other hand, don't bother. Really sparse on information. Doesn't hold a candle to Dotty.)
- posted by mo @ 11:46 AM

 
Weekly Goal Review
Let's see how it went this week!

1. Go bike riding for a total of 12 miles.
I did not do this, mostly because I spent the weekend in Sacramento. In fact, I almost didn't get on the bike at all, but I told myself that if I went for a bike ride, even a short one, I could go see Star Wars. I also thought of what I would say here in my Weekly Goal Review, if I didn't get on the bike at all. (Thanks, helpful readers.) I did 4.6 miles.

2. Do at least two upper body workouts and one ab workout.
I did this! Two upper body and one ab workout.

3. Write down everything I eat. (To get back into the journal habit.) I think this will naturally result in my making better choices, but we'll see!
I did do this. And as you know, as of Saturday, I've been writing everything down in my spiral-bound Weight Watcher's food diary. So that's good.

4. Wear a pedometer every day during the week.
I did this too! That's three out of four goals met; so not totally bad. On Monday I walked 2,835 steps. (I was in jury duty, so I did not have my usual walk to work.) On Tuesday my pedometer sort of crapped out, or I was wearing it wrong. So it said 3,484 at the end of the day, but that total is wrong. Wednesday was 4,819, Thursday was 6,132 and Friday was 8,006. I walked more and more as the week went on!

New goals for the forthcoming week. I am not going to make a bike riding goal, because this weekend I am going to be out of town. But we are planning on going hiking, so I will be getting exercise, even if my idea of "hiking" is like, less than three miles round trip. Two miles if it's uphill.

1. Wear a pedometer every day, including on the weekend (so I can get credit for the hiking).
2. Stay on program with Weight Watchers. (Including writing everything down.)
3. Two upper body workouts and two ab workouts. (Even though I have a short and busy week; let's see how it goes.)
4. Attend a Weight Watcher's meeting while on vacation.

Good luck to me!
- posted by mo @ 9:27 AM

 
The Terrible, No-good, Very Bad Number
I hope you realize that it is an act of bravery for me to admit that I weigh 232.8 pounds right now. And that's actually the good news, as I've been weighing in at 235 all week long.

I went to a Weight Watcher meeting in Sacramento, at a gay and lesbian community center, and it was like the Rocky Horror Picture Show of Weight Watcher meetings. When the leader went through the list of meeting times, people raised their hands in the air and made the numbers with their fingers, and shouted along with her. "EIGHT! IN THE MORNING!" (Waving eight fingers frantically in the air.) Later on, when she was asking if people lost 20 pounds, or 25 pounds, or 30 pounds, every time she said a number, the congregants clapped once. If someone said they had lost that number, they burst into applause. It was very festive and strange.

The meeting topic was VERY helpful: what to do if you're going on vacation. I am going on vacation next weekend, so it is perfect timing. (Obviously, the weekend before Memorial Day is the perfect time to have this topic.) Here is some of the VERY helpful advice I got:

1. Decide what your "winning outcome" is before you go on vacation. Do you want to lose? Stay the same? Or gain a little bit? Any of those is okay, as long as you think about it before you go on your trip. In my case, I want to lose weight. I do not want to postpone my weight loss for another week. (Plus, we're driving up the coast and will be doing hiking and picnicking. It's not like Europe, where we're eating waffles and drinking beer all day.)

2. Make a packing list. Pack exercise clothes to work out at your hotel gym. Pack a swimsuit to swim in the hotel pool. Pack a pedometer. Pack your Weight Watcher materials. Be prepared.

3. Pack some of your own food. We had already decided to do this, and will be bringing fresh fruit, healthy snacks, etc. along for the drive up the coast. But I didn't think about packing your own cereal so you don't get derailed by the continental hotel breakfast buffet. I will do this!

4. Do the trick where you start your points day at dinnertime. On vacation, the big meal of the day tends to be dinner. Once you've had dinner, you know how many points you have for breakfast and lunch the next day, which are easier to control.

5. Promise yourself that no matter what happens, you will go back to Weight Watchers when your vacation is over. (This is what I should have done when I got back from Europe, but did not. But oh well; no looking back.)

I was really happy to be back at meetings. I think this is going to be really good for me. Let the twelve-week twenty-five pound project begin! If all goes well, at the end of that time, I will weigh... okay, I can't do the math in my head. I will weigh less than I do now.
- posted by mo @ 11:10 AM

 
Synchronicity
"I'd like to go easy on myself, but I think that time has come and gone. It's time for serious action and little perhaps a long session of kicking my own ass. Kindness is a luxury afforded to those who work for it and the most I've done is have good intentions."

Like, exactly. (Although I've let it go for way, way longer than Erin.) Sometimes it's good to know you're not alone!
- posted by mo @ 1:12 PM

 
Alcohol Issues
One of the reasons I made "cut down on alcohol" one of my goals last week is that alcohol is probably the worst trigger that I have, in terms of bingeing on crappy food.

I do enjoy unwinding with a glass of wine on occasion, and in and of itself, a glass of wine is okay to have, maybe even healthy. (Something about antioxidants.) However, almost immediately, I want to go find something to snack on. Why is this?

I've been thinking about it, and I think the answer is quite simply that alcohol takes away some of my feelings of guilt associated with food. It makes eating more pleasurable, because I don't hate myself while I'm doing the eating. So of course I want to take advantage of this state of mind when it happens.

Obviously this is an unhealthy pattern. But it's fascinating to me. I didn't realize that my food-related emotions were such a burden until I understood how alcohol functions to lift that burden.

The solution for now is to keep cutting down on alcohol, and of course to keep cookies out of the house, that type of thing. Maybe planning for that reaction; having a glass of wine with a meal and then a pre-approved dessert afterwards. An indulgence, sure--but one that I have power over.
- posted by mo @ 2:50 PM

 
Day of Reckoning
It's been a long time coming, but I finally got the guts to step on the scale last night. And... ouch. That's all I can really say about that. I am about 25 pounds higher than I would like to be right now, and that ain't no joke.

I am always afraid that weighing myself will result in my running straight to the bag of chocolate chips I keep in the freezer for emergency purposes, and pouring the whole bag straight down my throat. But in fact, the bad news just gave me a sense of resolve. Because there is absolutely no reason I can't lose this weight, and there's absolutely no reason I can't start right now.

I've decided to go back to Weight Watchers for twelve weeks, in the hopes of losing an average of two pounds a week, and thereby losing those 25 pounds. If the past two years have taught me anything, it's that I need the accountability and structure and support of Weight Watchers meetings if I want to lose weight. Even if it fucks up my budget.

(My poor budget. Between car repairs, taxes and vacations, I can't seem to get ahead.)

Anyway. I have a few more long-ish posts in mind for Ointy, and you can expect it to be much more active around here for the next twelve weeks, if not forever. My meeting is on Saturday morning, and I will weigh in, and post the horrible total here for you all to experience schadenfreude over.
- posted by mo @ 9:42 AM

 
Two Minor Corrections
1. I had a second drink last week, at the Trashcan Sinatras show. Forgot about that! But anyway, regardless. Not bad.

2. In re-reading my last entry, I realize that there are two sexier words than "acid reflux," and they are "butt tolerance."
- posted by mo @ 12:12 PM

 
Weekly Goal Review
Okay, so let's talk about how I did on this week's goals.

1. Get at least ten miles of bike riding done over the course of the week.
I did this! Saturday was 6.5 miles, and Sunday was 4.3 miles, for a total of 10.8 miles. Getting on the bike on Sunday was painful, and by painful, I mean ow, my ass. I even wore padded bike shorts. I guess I need to build up my butt tolerance again.

2. Have either lunch-in-a-box, a healthy salad, or a veggie Subway sandwich for lunch every day.
I had acid reflux problems all week (boy, are there two sexier words in the English language than "acid reflux"? I don't think so). Two days I skipped lunch altogether (but then had office pizza later in the day). On Friday I did have a big salad. On one other day I had lunch in a box. I think I had Subway on the fifth day. So, eeh. The Healthy Lunch goal was a little derailed.

3. Limit alcoholic beverages.
I totally forgot about this one. Hmm. I don't think I've had a drink since my Mas last Sunday. Oh no, wait, I had a drink at the boring company meeting. And then nothing this weekend. One drink all week-- that's pretty good.

4. Do at least two upper-body workouts.
I did these Saturday and Sunday. I learned that doing the same exercise two days in a row kind of hurts.

I found it very helpful to have these goal-things, so I will set some new goals for the coming week and then see how I do!

1. Go bike riding for a total of 12 miles. (Upping this a little bit.)
2. Do at least two upper body workouts and one ab workout. (Again, upping it a bit.)
3. Write down everything I eat. (To get back into the journal habit.) I think this will naturally result in my making better choices, but we'll see!
4. Wear a pedometer every day during the week.
- posted by mo @ 4:28 PM

 
I Go Out Walking
According to Google Maps, I walked about 3.5 miles last night, although it did feel like more! It felt like we walked across all of San Francisco to get from my work to a restaurant for dinner and then to the club where we saw the Trashcan Sinatras play a delightful show. Anyway, it wasn't part of my goal for this week to do a lot of walking, but if it were, I would be doing great!
- posted by mo @ 9:41 AM

 
Great Weight Loss Plan!
"Or you can pour yourself a bowl of Kashi Go Lean and slice a banana and pour some vanilla soy milk over the whole deal, and declare it Good and Filling. And then you've found yourself on a road that is Good and Filling, and you weigh yourself three times a day because Kashi Go Lean can't lie. I have Gone Lean. Where's the Leaness, people?"

I love when there are updates over at Plork. I also love the suggestion in the comments: "You should publish this blog make a ton of money and hire a personal trainer!!"

Man, why didn't I think of that!
- posted by mo @ 1:13 PM

 
Succexercise.
On Friday, I did achieve my goal of going for a bike ride. My legs hurt even before I got on the bike; for some reason my walk to and from work left my legs aching. (It's about two and a half miles of walking, and there are hills involved. Still, it's usually harder on Mondays than it is on Fridays.)

I really did want to push myself, though, so I went five miles on the bike. This coming weekend, I am going to try for ten miles.

My eating has been up and down. I've been good about buying healthy food and bringing it to work, but I've also had days where I don't eat much and then graze on sugar-free pudding and chocolate chips. Yesterday I was cooking for a dinner party, and breakfast was a large caramel macchiato and some "reduced-fat" coffee cake that still has a million calories in it. Lunch was three Skinny Cow sandwiches. No wonder I was hungry when dinnertime came around.

Speaking of dinner, I made this divine tomato/lemon salad, some weird pasta that I think I screwed up, and sauteed eggplant. I love eggplant, but there is a rumor that it has no nutritional value. Please say it ain't so! Because I really want eggplant to be a healthy thing to eat, like, all the time.

I feel like I should make some Goals for the Week, like they do over at Pare. Okay.

1. Get at least ten miles of bike riding done over the course of the week.
2. Have either lunch-in-a-box, a healthy salad, or a veggie Subway sandwich for lunch every day.
3. Limit alcoholic beverages.
4. Do at least two upper-body workouts.

That's all I can think of right now. We'll see how it goes!
- posted by mo @ 2:45 PM

 
Amazing Discovery
There are only FIFTEEN CALORIES in an Otter Pop. Louie Bloo Raspberry! Alexander the Grape! Strawberry Shortkook! All your favorites!

Plus, one box of Otter Pops only cost me a dollar at my grocery store. That is the discovery of the week, right there.
- posted by mo @ 2:03 PM