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Which Old Witch? |
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| Ding,
dong, the witch is… well, not dead, but she’s alllll the way on the other
side of the office now.
The Crazy Dog Lady is being moved the hell out of our room and into her own little office come Monday. I don’t even have a trace… not even a particle… of bitterness that she is getting an office. I am just so thrilled to have the suffocating scarf of her constant presence removed from my throat. Remember the mailroom door? I don’t know if I mentioned this or not, but every day at 6:00 she huffs up, huffs over to the door, looks at the sign (“This door will remain open during business hours”) and huffs, “It’s not business hours anymore.” and then slams the door shut. I found out that Brenda asked Sheila to close the door every day while she was on vacation. Well not “asked” so much as “ordered” her to close the door. When I started screaming and yelling about this (“She’s not even HERE and she’s still ANNOYING ME!”) Sheila was totally flustered. “But she’s going to ask me if I closed the door… I can’t lie!” “Well,” I responded, “just tell her that you’re not going to cater to her COMPLETELY IDIOTIC DEMANDS.” Then I rended my garments. (Okay not really, but I wanted to.) So… where was I going with the door story? I don’t remember. The point is, she won’t be around to annoy me anymore. I can safely avoid her for the vast majority of the rest of my life. I guarantee she’s going to come in on Monday acting like she’s been victimized. She’s really good at that. And I’m sure she knows it’s her repellant personality that’s responsible for the move. there’s other explanation for why she would be moved all the way across the office. We have a huge room here (which used to house five people) and there are only three people in it now, including her. And then (she says with a blissful sigh) there were two.
I took a good long look at my finances today and realized I can’t possibly go to New York at the end of July. I told my sister that very thing earlier this year, but it still sucks that I can’t work it out. It’s just that the extra three weeks of pay, and the $50 that my company pays towards my health insurance each month, is not something I can forfeit right now. However, once I quit my job in August, I will most likely go. I guarantee that the Sugar Mama will let me stay with her, even if Abby isn’t with me. She’s super nice to me just by proxy. And she will do laser hair removal for free for me, and I have hair I’d like removed in a big way. (I don’t know where it came from, but I know that it needs to GO AWAY.) It’s too good of an opportunity… the price of the trip would be a fraction of the cost of getting hair removal in L.A. Plus I get to visit my friends (hint hint) on the East Coast (HINT). And go see Superstar with them. Hint.
When Matt and I get married, I’ll definitely be handling the finances. I found out yesterday that Matt absolutely hates to pay his bills. I find it somewhat relaxing, strange as it may be. I certainly don’t hate it. So I offered to take all of his bills and figure them out. He was in default on almost everything… made me nostalgic for the Monique of three years ago, who was in exactly the same predicament. I also acquired some blank checks and went to work. I created a whole financial strategy for him (which is entitled... get ready for the creativity... "PLAN") and it was fun! By September, five of his major bills (credit card, car, school loan one, school loan two, and back taxes) will be paid off. I am just that good. Of course, Tyler’s portion of the rent money is going to come in quite handy in achieving this goal. (I was going to insert a puppy joke here, but I can’t possibly compete with “aboobooboo”. Who could?) I also wrote a check to myself (from Matt’s account, of course) to cover his half of our bills this month… and tacked on an extra $10. I figure buying me lunch was the least he could do, right? I listed it on the chart as a “processing fee.” I know he should probably learn to pay his own bills, but for now, I don’t mind the trade off. I really don’t mind getting him back on his feet, so he doesn’t feel overwhelmed. And now I have leverage that I can use to ask him to do things I can’t stand… such as hauling laundry up those long flights of stairs. Mr. “Survivor 2001” could probably bounce to the top of the Statue of Liberty holding a refrigerator on his head. Me? I get to the first landing and I start looking around for the Sherpas. |
marku:
 What I'm Reading: High Five. Yes, I'm weak. I saw it at the grocery store. pink rosesJournal Quote of the Day: “However you look at love...when you find it, you have to be glad you've found it, and you have to go where it leads you.'”Random Tidbit: I am eating something I developed a taste for in Greece: feta cheese on french bread. Yuuum. It's actually the remnants of a Greek salad. Surprisingly, our local diner makes one almost as good as the ones in Greece.Please click these links. It doesn’t cost you a dime, but it gets me one. Mo at the Movies: New! The 25 Funniest Mo-vies Work Days Left: 38 |
